Ok, So Where Then?

After my post about the douchey married guy, my grandmother sent me a message expressing concern for me and encouraging me not to go to bars to meet guys.

Let me assure you… I do not go to bars expecting to meet Mr. Right. I don’t even expect to meet Mr. Nice. But you never know.

Which led me to comtemplate… where is a 21st-century city girl supposed to meet a nice, nornal, attractive, available, straight man?

When my grandmother was a young woman in the mid 20th century it was easier. The world was smaller. You met a man at school or church or down the street.

I’m no longer in school so that isn’t an option. Church would be ideal but 5 years at The Journey Church and still nothing to write home about except for some exceptional men who are already married. The down-the-street idea is romantic but literally doesn’t exist in NYC. Knowing a neighbor is rare enough. For that neighbor to be a tall, attractive, single male… well, it’s just not likely.

Which leaves the online dating option. Been there, tried that and the guys online can be just as douchey as the guys in the bars except without the excuse of alcohol.

The gym breeds obsessive hard bodies. And as interested as I am in being healthy and staying relatively fit, I could not be considered a health nut or particularly hard of body. So once again… dead end.

Add to all that the fact that the first date is a non-entity thanks to social media: facebook, twitter and dating profiles, and it becomes nearly impossible to meet a nice, normal man to believe in and date.

And don’t forget that I’m a nerdy girl. So to find that socially adjusted, , brave, nerdy man is even harder. (There’s a whole separate list of where to meet those men to come.)

I’m constantly on the lookout but not the pursuit. I kind of think that when the time is right that Mr. Right will somehow sense it and come running.
Until then I choose to enjoy life and the crazy stupid circumstances I so often find myself in. I can’t say it hasn’t been entertaining.

And if I ever figure out exactly where all those good men are hiding in NYC, then ladies… I will let you know!

5 responses to “Ok, So Where Then?”

  1. Martha Virginia Spivey Avatar
    Martha Virginia Spivey

    Come south, girl friend.

    Like

  2. Volunteer for something that is meaningful to you. Who knows, one day the guy working alongside you might be someone interesting—at least, he’ll be someone with whom you share one interest.

    Like

  3. Chelsea Piers Sports Center. It’s not quite the regular gym. Lots of men looking to play group sports so much less the ego and more so team work and camaraderie.

    Like

  4. MVS, I’m in the South and still nothing. I feel your pain, my friend!

    Like

  5. Renee Walters Bechtel Avatar
    Renee Walters Bechtel

    What’s the story behind the “married man in the bar” you speak of?? I can only imagine…..
    Stay stong my beautiful cousin. You will find Mr. Right. “Refuse to settle in order to settle down.” You deserve the best. xo
    love, nay

    Like

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