If I asked you to describe the perfect man, what would you say, ladies? Or men, what about the perfect woman?
My checklist looks a little like this… Click Here.
And the funny thing is we tell ourselves we have “high standards” and that settling is bad. Our loved ones tell us never to “settle for less than we deserve” meanwhile they are begging us to go ahead and settle down already.
And is it just me or does settle down sound an awful lot like “settling.” Perhaps that’s because it’s the same freaking word!
Who was the wise guy that started calling it “settling down?”
Anyone out there married? Did it feel like you were settling down in life? Does having children make you feel settled? Or is it one adventure to the next.
I think you know already that I’m not married or with child. But I know enough to know that that’s the worst description of marriage and married life I’ve ever heard. And if that’s what it’s like… I’ll tell you right now, marriage ain’t for me. Hello!! I’m a hurricane. It is physically impossible for me to “settle down” or to “settle” in any way. My winds may get smoother, but they’ll always be there, blowing away. I have a sneaking suspicion it’s nothing like that! (Marrieds…back me up here.)
If the goal in finding love is to settle down and yet somehow not end up settling for “less than you deserve” then I think it’s a losing battle. And making a checklist for Mr. “Perfect” seems like a futile attempt to control the uncontrollable. Isn’t it better when Mr. or Mrs. Surprising comes along? Maybe he isn’t taller than you. Maybe she isn’t a D cup. Maybe he didn’t go to Harvard Law School. Maybe SHE didn’t go to Harvard Law School. See what I’m getting at here.
So, yeah. I went ahead and threw my checklist away. Cause if I’m honest with myself, I’m looking for a Mr. Darcy and all I’m finding is Mr. Ed. (That’s right… the talking horse!)
Checklists… we all make them. But at the end of the day we should all be equally prepared to rip them up and throw them away. Standards are OK. Compatibility is a thing. But don’t let either get in the way of what can come along when you aren’t holding that person under a microscope of unrealistic expectations!